Monday, September 29, 2008

When I was desperate, I called out

This morning while doing my Bible study, I was reflecting on this verse,

“When I was desperate, I called out, and GOD got me out of a tight spot!”
-Psalm 34:6 MSG

I was remembering times when I have felt desperate and realized that those times of desperation often involved conflicts between Christians, either between individuals or between groups of Christians. My deep desire is ALWAYS for reconciliation and when that doesn’t happen, I am overwhelmed. “Why can’t this be worked out?” “Why can’t there be forgiveness, mercy, grace?” “Why can’t we all just ‘get along’?” “Why can’t reconciliation happen?” “Why won’t they just do what I say/want?” Unfortunately, there have been multiple opportunities for God to rescue me from my desperation. One truth that has emerged is the truth that I can’t control these situations/people. Hmph!! I guess I’ve needed to learn that lesson over and over. Today, as I reflected on that truth, this additional truth/corollary came to me: God IS in control; Only God is Sovereign. However, I actually hate it when people say this! Not because it is not true but because of what I THINK they mean when they say it. Often what is suggested by this statement is that God has caused this (whatever “this” is) to happen or that God has approved of what is happening, because “God is in control; God is sovereign.” It is the implication that because God is sovereign, this (again, whatever “this” is) was “His will.” And here I go, up on my soapbox. Not everything that happens is God’s will. And we can’t just “decide” something was God’s will because it will make us feel better, relieve our guilt, and/or remove any responsibility we have to bring love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control to the situation. We need to show greater discernment when using the expressions, “God is in control;” or “God is sovereign.” Yes, these statements are true. God is Sovereign; God is in control. But, what do we mean by such statements. Back to my Bible study this morning: The epiphany came when I said to myself, “I can’t control these situations/people. Only God is in control/sovereign.” What struck me this time about these proclamations was that I need to recognize and affirm God’s sovereignty/power to act in our lives and yes, he might even call me/use me to act in a situation but even he does not always exert his control/power over us (even though he could). So, who am I to desire control over the actions of others when the God of the Universe continues to show such great restraint in dealing with our behaviors/actions/sins? Am I making any sense? For me, this brought great relief. I can acknowledge that I am not in control. I can also acknowledge that God is in control without assuming that he caused something to happen, or that he approved of what happened, or that he will correct what has happened. In his great wisdom, he MIGHT intervene or he MIGHT allow things to proceed. I do know “that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28) I don’t always know what this is going to look like, how He will work, how quickly it will happen, or what the “good” is that He is working for. But I know that God is God and I am not and this comforts me in my desperation.

When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul.
- Psalm 94:19

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Summer Reading

I enjoyed some terrific books this summer, some easier than others, but I would not describe any as "fluff." Each book has a message that deserves thoughtful consideration and conversation. To that end, a book club is beginning next week and our first book to discuss is Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell. After reading it, I passed it along to Ray. We will both be participating in the Book Club and I can't wait for that conversation.


Books I finished:

Traveling Mercies by Anne Lamott
12 Extraordinary Women by John MacArthur
Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell
The McDonaldization of the Church by John Drane
Revolutionary Parenting by George Barna
real sex by Lauren Winner
7 things he'll never tell you (but you need to know) by Kevin Leman

Books I'm currently reading:

The Moral Vision of the New Testament by Richard B. Hays
Recovering the Scandal of the Cross by Green and Baker
Now You're SPEAKING My Language by Gary Chapman

I love to have multiple books going at the same time. It provides variety and also, when I have one that's more difficult (like The Moral Vision), I can read it a little at a time so I can absorb (understand) the message. Everyone should be reading something. Of course, in addition to all these books, I'm also reading the Bible - it always has something fresh, something challenging, something outrageous, something comforting, something I need. I love to underline, highlight, and copy scripture onto 3x5 cards to memorize.

My most recent 3x5 card says this:

"See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ." Colossians 2:8

Thursday, September 04, 2008

He has made my life easier

I've been wanting to give blogging another attempt but have been waiting for something to scream, "write about me" and today that something occurred. This morning a breakfast was held at IBM to honor Ray for 25 years of service. There were approximately 40 people in attendance. Ray was presented with a book full of letters congratulating him on joining the Quarter Century Club. Also, multiple peers, employees, and managers took turns saying a few words. From the first person until the last, I was overwhelmed with the words that were chosen to honor him. Not because the words surprised me, but because they affirmed everything that I know and love about Ray. Ray's boss, Dave, began by saying that usually these events turn into roasts as the guest of honor is repeatedly made fun of. Then he said, "However, how do you make fun of hard work, honesty, clarity, and integrity?" Dave, and others after him, went on to say how valuable Ray has been to IBM, his management team, his peers, and his employees. Multiple guests commented on Ray's value as a mentor. Someone made the comment that he has often had people tell him that they go to Ray for guidance, direction, leadership, and understanding. They commented on Ray's "brutal" honesty and high expectations. But each one said that Ray expects no less of himself than he expects of others. One man specifically brought tears to my eyes as he got teary-eyed himself when sharing what it has meant to him to work with Ray. He goaded Ray for expecting so much and being unwilling to accept anything less than 100% but he got very emotional when he said that after a job well done, Ray had written him a letter of appreciation affirming his hard work and dedication to the project. He acknowledged that Ray does not lavish flattery on anyone, but when Ray gives you praise, he means every word and therefore, those words of praise are priceless. A vice president of IBM went so far as to say that in Austin, TX, IBM can not get a chip out the door without Ray East - what a testimony of his value to his employer. There were many other comments made about Ray but one in particular will remain with me because it is also so true of my own relationship with Ray. One man, followed by others, made the comment, "Ray has made my life easier." Because of Ray's hard work, diligence, honesty, integrity, and leadership, their lives were made easier. Ironically, even the high expectations he puts on them contributes to an easier life. Because he sets the bar high for himself and everyone around him, they all get to enjoy the benefits that come when you achieve something that others thought might be impossible. As I think about that statement, "Ray has made my life easier," I, of course, think of my own life. Ray has provided for our family spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically, financially, and socially. If I could use one word to describe Ray, it would be the word "intentional." He is the spiritual head of our family and has spent 25+ years of intentional seeking, studying, and praying to be the man God wants him to be. Although no one at the breakfast table this morning specifically called Ray out as a man of God, it was evident by every word spoken about him that he has lived a life of integrity at work, at home, in the community, and in the church. I am so proud that this is the man who has taught our sons what a man looks like. I'm thankful for 26 years of marriage to Ray East. He has made my life easier.

Monday, February 04, 2008

Now that I have created a blog, I find that I have nothing to say! And the thoughts that are running through my head seem meaningless to anyone but me. For instance, I am thrilled that the New York Giants won the Super Bowl. Why - because the quarterback is a southern boy, who played football for the University of Mississippi, which is the state of my birth, and because my mother calls his family by their first names (no, not to their faces, but you'd think so). She goes on about the Manning boys (Cooper, Peyton, and Eli) and their parents, Archie and Olivia, as if they lived next door. She remembers everything (well, almost everything) they've done: where they played high school football(Newman), why Cooper had to quit playing football (spinal condition), Archie's years at the New Orleans Saints w/o a winning season, and how "everybody" always said Eli would be the best quarterback in the family (yet to be determined). Amid all my excitement about the game and a southern boy being victorious, what I am overwhelmed with is the fact that my 86 year old mother has a better memory than most of us, keeps up with what's going on in the world (including, but not limited to Super Bowl XLII), could analyze the game play by play on request, teaches us to enjoy every moment, and is a delightful presence in our home. I have been told that I'm turning into my mother. May it be so!!

"Honor your father and mother - which is the first commandment with a promise - that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." Ephesian 6:2-3

Monday, January 28, 2008

Good Morning! I'm excited to begin blogging. I've enjoyed reading Brad's, Garrett's, and Heath's blogs (and the comments from others) for the last two summers and I've been inspired by them to begin my own blog. Admitedly, I am doing this for myself. I have many random thoughts that I rarely put on a page. This is my way of clarifying, condensing, editing, and summarizing these thoughts into a concrete message that others may (or may not) be interesting in reading. If nothing else, I'll have a written record for myself that reflects where I am, where I've come from, and where I'm going. Thanks for reading.